Heartland Memories from David Lewis

http://heartlandmemories.com/bits/AlmostArkansas.mp3

Once upon a time I lived in Almost Arkansas, Missouri. In spite of how bizarre some southern Missouri towns are named, you will not find Almost Arkansas on any map, but it is there. I’ve seen it. Unlike the mythical “Lake Woebegon”, Almost Arkansas exists. Sid, a German shepherd who brought home his […]

http://heartlandmemories.com/bits/Silverthorn.mp3

He was about 6½ feet tall, weighed maybe 280 pounds, and had straight blue-black hair to below his waist. He looked down at me through hard dark brown eyes from a walnut face and said, “You’re white. Where’d you get that necklace?”

He was referring to a Native American, deer-bone hair pipe, four-strand choker […]

No More Horsin’ Around http://heartlandmemories.com/bits/NotAgain.mp3

The year was 1969 and I was in the market for a horse. In horse shopping, “let the buyer beware” applies even more than when purchasing a used car, picking a mate, or renting John Wayne Gacy for a fun weekend. Sellers of horses, often kindly, almost Uncle-like gentlemen are […]

http://heartlandmemories.com/bits/Crusher.mp3

His name was Crusher and he was a policeman. At the time, so was I – fresh out of the Police Training Institute, 160 hours of basic instruction under my Sam Browne Belt, 21 years old, and so green I squeaked when I walked. Crusher was an 8-year veteran with a bad […]

Here Kitty, Kitty http://heartlandmemories.com/bits/TheSmellWillTell.mp3

I never did understand why Steve Seymour wanted a skunk. When I was small, my Uncle Floyd had a skunk, de-scented, that lived in the house with him and his wife, Flo. It was a low-slung, black waddle with white stripes that would occasionally scuttle out from under the […]

Telling and Dwelling http://heartlandmemories.com/bits/Memories.mp3

I watched a movie the other night called “Doc Hollywood” and enjoyed it a great deal for the fifth or sixth time. No guns, no standoffs, no raging mutant android cross-dressing Cyclops stalking the countryside – just a young, hotshot surgeon trapped for a time in small-town America.

Musing after the […]

http://heartlandmemories.com/bits/Caesar.mp3

Before this epic begins, I must warn you that this is a long bit – if you actually intend to pay attention, perhaps a cup of coffee is in order, or a sandwich…a big one.

“C’mon,” she said, “go with me. I’m gonna look at their new colt. Let’s take your bike.”

She […]

Attitude In Red http://heartlandmemories.com/bits/ElRojo.mp3

His name was “El Rojo”. He was a rooster. I got him from Jeremiah Mavis when I lived in “Almost Arkansas”, Missouri. Jeremiah Mavis was an Arkansas Ridge Runner. Big, raw-boned, and redheaded, he was of hearty Ozark stock. His biggest claim to fame were his wife’s newly-installed breasts and a […]

http://heartlandmemories.com/bits/Compassion.mp3

I’m sure many if not even most of you out there lay awake nights wondering why I choose to spend the vast majority of my time sequestered away from civilization in the company only of Digger the outstanding dog, Clancy the incredible dog, Grizz the irritating cat, and Laura the coveted wife. What could […]